It’s no surprise that women who are married with children are stressed.
After all, they have to play some roles as a mother and wife: cook, doctor, teacher, maid, event planner, and so much more. But, a recent survey found that nearly half of women find their husbands more stressful than their kids.
In a survey done by Today.com, which interviewed more than 7,000 moms from the United States, they found that on average, most moms would rate their stress levels at an 8.5 out of 10. According to the same study done by Today, almost half the mothers (46 percent) found that their husbands caused them more stress than their children did!
One of the causes of this stress was revealed in the fact that around 75% of women that answered the survey reported they do the majority of the parenting and most of the other household duties. That means that only 25% of women feel their partners do an equal share or the majority of the parenting and other household duties, leaving women stuck doing more than their fair share.
And finally, researchers in that Today survey found that 1 in every 5 mothers said that a major source of daily stress was feeling like they didn’t have enough time in the day to get everything done that needed to be done, in part because of a lack of support from their partners. It should be no surprise that this was particularly true in women who also worked outside of the home yet still shouldered most of the work around the house.
Many women reported that some of their stress came from the simple fact that their husbands acted like overgrown children. It meant they had, even more, responsibilities around the home since they also needed to care for their husbands even though it was their husbands that they should have been able to look to for support.
This is far from the only research that supports the claim that women are more stressed by their husbands than men are by their wives. According to the University of Padova in Italy, these stress levels actually play a role later in life within the marriages as well as in health and longevity. These researchers found that later in life when the wife passes away, the husband’s health tends to deteriorate while when a wife loses her husband she tends to become healthier and shows improvement in dealing with stress and depression.
While the researchers at the University of Padova were unable to come up with a deciding factor as to why this was the case, they speculated that the cause was because male partners relied more heavily on their female partners than vice versa.
The most important thing both men and women can do when faced with these facts is to ask “What can be done about this?” The truth is, there is a lot that can be done to solve this problem, no matter how stressed out a woman may be or how immature her husband may act. Both partners need to be willing to step up to the plate and be prepared to do what it takes to solve this growing problem.
First and foremost, a conversation must be had. Wives need to open up to their husbands about how they’re feeling stressed about the way the household and parenting duties are divided, and husbands must be prepared to genuinely listen to those concerns and be prepared to work with their wives to find a solution that will work for the whole family.
One of the best ways to reduce the stress a woman is feeling because of her husband is to make sure the household and parenting duties are divided evenly. To start, couples should make a list of all the daily, weekly, and monthly household chores that need to be done and make sure that each partner is pulling their weight.
Wives need to learn to trust their husbands with household duties. Many times, this is the reason that the wife is doing everything. She doesn’t believe her husband to do it correctly or the way she would like it to be done, so she just does it herself instead. When a man agrees to do a particular household duty, it’s essential for the wife to step aside and allow him to do it, even if it’s not done “right.”